Bean: ‘It’s never too late to fight for your happiness and find yourself.’

12 Oct 2023

News

Beautiful Thing, the pivotal coming-out and coming-of-age play of the 90s, is arriving in our Courtyard theatre on 18 October. To celebrate its honest, evocative and uplifting themes, we're sharing 5 blogs over 5 days from members of the LGBTQ+ community in Leeds talking about their own 'first love' and 'coming out' stories.

Hello! I’m Bean and my pronouns are they/them. At the age of 20, I came to the UK from Poland for a gap year. It’s safe to say it got extended just a tad.

I knew I was bisexual from a very young age, and I’ve always been curious about my gender identity. I was the girl who liked football, wearing baseball caps and never quite felt OK in a dress. As a twin I was forever being compared to my sister while I tried very hard to find my own identity. I wasn’t quite the tomboy, nor was I the “girly girl” type. I was neither.

I came out as non-binary last year, when I finally accepted that I was born this way. Even though my sister and I have chosen different paths in life, we have stayed very close and she has been super supportive in my enby (non-binary) journey.

The year 2020 was difficult for all of us, but it allowed me to change my life for the better. The pandemic taught me that money is not everything in life and it’s never too late to fight for your happiness and find yourself. Growing up with Sex and the City, I dreamt about having a fabulous gay friend like Stanford was to Carrie, and I always felt strongly connected to the LGBTQ community, despite having mainly seen it only on TV. You could say my first love was every queer person I wanted to be when I was growing up.

Living in the England means that I can freely live my gay life. I don’t have to hide who I am, as the UK is seen as being a more accepting country. So, when I started my non-binary journey I joined few dating websites dedicated to LGBTQ people. There, I found a lot of trans and enby souls, who understood and validated the feelings I’ve had all my life. I felt so much warmth and positivity from my loving friends, partners and family.

The support I have had when it comes to my gender feelings, my journey and my body dysmorphia has been incredible, even if the idea of top surgery has scared and worried a few people. Explaining what gender affirming surgery means to me has given me so much strength and has led to me wanting to help the community through volunteering and engaging in LGBTQ events.

We live in a world where being different is a little scary, but I am here to tell you that regardless of age, nationality and background, you can still make important realisations about yourself, just like I did. There is nothing wrong with me. I was born a little Bean; it just took me a while to accept it.

Thanks to Rob of Angels of Freedom and Kirsty from Bi+ Leeds Social Group for their invaluable support in gathering these stories together.

  • MAJOR FUNDERS

    Arts Council
  • Leeds City Council
  • LTB Foundation
  • PRINCIPAL CAPITAL AND FAMILIES PARTNER

    Caddick Group
  • PRINCIPAL CAPITAL AND ACCESS PARTNER

    Irwin Mitchell